First draft
201003642 honghua cui
page 78
a favorite childhood memory
still now I think most of interesting things happen in my childhood and since I growed up I don't have any interesting things or memory. all of memory just focus in the childhood. I have kinds and colorful memory in the childhood I want talk about one of the interesting things.
when I was childhood I got my first love and we make love together. I can say he is my first boyfriend. I just remember he got big eyes and very clean and good at sport and very naught. we always fighting which is stand for love each other. and he's score often higher than me which means he study hard. when he make up just looks like wonderful girl so beautiful. when I first met him is when I was third grade in primary school he change school came to our school, and I think he looks like hansom but in that time I did not expect he became my boyfriend. but a few days latter he began to talk to me just like don't speak loudly just like that. since that we fighting each other and pile up affection
Because we are so young did not hurt each other. that's why this memory the most beautiful one. I don't want forget that. I think my first love story very interesting and very proud.
a favorite childhood memory
ReplyDeleteStill now I think most of interesting things happen in my childhood and since I growed up I don't have any interesting things or memory. All of memory just focus in the childhood. So I think I have kinds and colorful memory in the childhood I want talk about one of the interesting things.
when I was childhood I got my first love and we make love together, and I can say he is my first boyfriend. I can remember he has big eyes with energy and always clean and good at playing every sport and humorous. we always fighting which is stand for love each other. and I memory he is good at study. he's score often higher than me which means he study hard. Still now we always talk about score who is better. I am very proud of if he make up just looks like wonderful girl so beautiful. when I first met him was when I was third grade in primary school and he change school came to our school, in that time I tought he very hansom and never expect he became my boyfriend, because he was very perfection, but a few days latter he began talk to me. Is not soft talking looks like order to mw just like don't speak loudly, I never speak loudly anymore. In that time got angry with him. But since that we fighting each other and pile up affection.
Still now I can remember about him because we are so young did not hurt each other. As well as we made purity love that's why which memory the most beautiful one. I don't want forget that. I think my first love story is the most proud story.
1. What I like about this piece of writing is your topic. Most people like to talk about their first love!
ReplyDelete2. Your main point seems to be your first love, which is one of your favorite childhood memories.
3. Because we are so young did not hurt each other. This line struck me as powerful, because I found myself lose my purity and hurt others.
4. I would like to know more specific process that your affection piled up.